Preparing myself mentally for my ritual

Today I need to prepare to ask the Deity in perfect love and perfect trust for the help I need to heal.

Holy Creator, bring me strength. Grant me your power to heal myself. Grant me your protection against the evil I have suffered. Grant my friends the strength and will to help me perform the ritual I've created in your honor and for my healing. I ask this in the name of wholeness. I pray in perfect love and perfect trust. Selah. Amen.

The Ritual, part the third

I marked a circle in Rip and Jen's backyard by raking leaves into about a six-foot circle. I used a small table for the altar, put my purity candle on it, our black and white balance eggs, an incense burner I borrowed from Jen because I forgot ours, and the cauldron in the center.

I set a yellow candle at East, a red candle at South, a blue candle at West, and a white candle at North (it should have been green but I could not for my life find a green taper).

We all prepared in our own way and read through the ritual. We entered the circle and I lit the purity candle.

I prayed.
"The presence of the noble Deity extends everywhere,
Throughout many strange, magical,
And beautiful worlds,
To all places of wilderness, enchantment, and freedom."

I took the East Candle out of the ground, lit it from the purity candle, put it back in the ground, and invoked protection.
“Protector of the East, watch over this ritual of healing.
The winds are the Deity's servants."
Nicholas did the same thing with the South Candle and invoked protection.
"Protector of the South, watch over this ritual of healing.
At all blessings and desire
The sun brings forth life anew."
Jen did the same with the West Candle and invoked protection.
"Protector of the West, watch over this ritual of healing.
The seas are the domain of our Serene Creator,
The mysteries of the depths are the Deity's alone."
Cliff did the same with the North Candle, and invoked protection.
"Protector of the North, watch over this ritual of healing.
The Deity is awesome,
The Powers of death bow before the Creator."

I pointed my hand with my first two fingers extended and walked from East to South to West to North and back to East to cast the circle and then said:
"The circle is sealed, and all herein
Are totally and completely apart
From the outside world,
That we may glorify the Creator whom we adore.
Blessed Be!"
Everyone else repeated: "Blessed Be!"

We all faced East and chanted:
"As above, so below
As the universe, so the soul.
As without, so within.
Blessed and gracious one,
On this day do we consecrate to you
Our bodies,
Our minds,
And our spirits.
Blessed Be!"

I took the parchment that I'd written the banishing and read it.

"He raped my body and soul.
He stole my childhood.
He locked me in pain for twenty years.
I banish him from my soul.
I banish him from my body.
I reject the pain and terror he caused me.
I reject the grip he has held on my life.
I reclaim my body in the name of the Deity of Love.
I reclaim my soul in the name of the Deity of Strength.
I reclaim my name in the name of the Deity of Power.
William Linwood Parrish, you no longer have power over me.
I am a woman, the bearer of life, and I banish your destruction.
I am Nora Holland Parrish, and I am stronger than your evil.
I am stronger than your evil.
Selah. Amen."

I then lit it on fire with the purity candle and let it burn in the cauldron (almost burnt myself because the cauldron is little and I was trying to keep all the parchment paper ashes in it).

We all prayed about three times as it burnt:
“Let the sacred flame destroy that which causes pain and harm.
“Let the sacred flame bring healing where there was hurt.”

When the paper was burnt, we meditated for a few minutes, and then we all turned North and said: “We thank you, Guardian of the North for your guidance and protection and power. We bid you hail and farewell.” Then Cliff extinguished the North Candle.

We all turned West and said: “We thank you, Guardian of the West for your guidance and protection and power. We bid you hail and farewell.” Then Jen extinguished the West Candle.

We all turned South and said: “We thank you, Guardian of the South for your guidance and protection and power. We bid you hail and farewell.” Then Nicholas extinguished the South Candle.

We all turned East and said: “We thank you, Guardian of the East for your guidance and protection and power. We bid you hail and farewell.” Then I extinguished the East Candle.

Then I prayed:
"Our rite draws to its end.
O lovely and gracious Deity,
Be with each of us as we depart.
The circle is broken!"

I felt the power moving within me while we did the ritual. As the parchment paper burnt, my whole body tingled with power. I can still feel it.

I prayed so hard off and on all day today for this to help. I really think it did. I feel so calm. Very alert, but calm.

Rip chose not to participate in the ritual because he felt that his energy would mess it up, so he stayed outside the circle, and I asked him to direct his power as best he could toward focusing on the success of the ritual.

I want to publicly thank Rip and Jen for letting me use their yard for a private yet outdoor setting for my healing ritual. I also want to publicly thank Nicholas, Cliff, and Jen for helping me perform the ritual.

I feel better than I have in a long time. I feel free.