unseeing 2 November 2005

[azdesertrose]

you really don't know
do you
you really never saw

i wonder how
you never saw
but maybe i hide things
too well
too much practice

i wonder how
you never saw
you lived with me for years
you knew about so many things
and yet you never saw

you still don't see
do you
you never noticed

am i that good
at blending into the woodwork
at building walls
at hiding inside myself
am i really that good at it

if anyone should know
you should
and yet you never saw

or did you see
and just couldn't say anything
paralyzed by your own fears
your own roadblocks
those things that keep you from speaking

because you never seemed
to like to speak of emotion
or to show it

maybe that's why it seems
like you never noticed
like you didn't know
as though you couldn't see
the things i tried to hide

or did you not see
and i just wish you could
see me as i am
and not as who you want me to be